How do I stop my boyfriend sharing naked photos of me?

When I was with my boyfriend, he kept on at me until I sent him some naked photos to his phone. Now we've broken up and he's sending them to everyone at school. I'm so humiliated. And now they're on the internet too. How can I get him to take them down? It's ruining my life.

What your boyfriend did to you was a breach of trust, and you’re understandably hurt and humiliated by his actions. What he did is also against the law, and you can use this to stop him spreading these images further. We’ve spoken to two experts about what you need to do next.

Jennifer Perry, CEO of the Digital Trust, says: “If you were under the age of 18 when these photos were taken, then in the eyes of the law, he has distributed child pornography. Send a letter to his parents, saying if the images are not deleted, you will report your ex-boyfriend to the police for possession and distribution of illegal pornography. You should also request a list of students that he sent it to, and also send them a letter. Report the image or video immediately to the website in question, and untag yourself in any photos so they’re not connected to you. Also make a report to the Internet Watch Foundation here, and tell the website that you’re doing this. They’re breaking the law by hosting these photos, so you can threaten them with legal action too.

Psychotherapist, Dr Aaron Balick, says it’s important you don’t go through this ordeal alone. He says: “It’s super embarrassing but it’s best to stop it now rather than pretend it’s not happening. Make sure you tell somebody so you can get help shutting it down and holding the person responsible accountable. It can be very hurtful and shaming if this happens to you. Regaining some control will help, but so will talking about your feelings with a person you trust. Know that however awful it feels, it is just for now and life does go on.”

In the future, it’s worth remembering that you should never feel pressured to do anything sexually that you’re not comfortable with. If a partner is harassing you into something and making you feel guilty, this is actually abuse, and you don’t have to stand for it. We have more information on help and support if this is going on in your relationship here.

Next Steps

  • The Revenge Porn Helpline can help you stop the reach of explicit photos. If you are over 18, ring them confidentially on 0345 6000 459
  • BullyingUK offers advice and support to victims of bullying. Call on 0808 800 2222.
  • Chat about this subject on our Discussion Boards.
  • Need help but confused where to go locally? Download our StepFinder iPhone app to find local support services quickly.

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