Threesomes

Sex is generally seen as an intimate act between two people. If the movies are to be believed, it’s a passionate and steamy moment shared by lovers. But that isn’t always the case. There are a tonne of different ways have sex, and the number of people involved may differ. What is a threesome, or the menage a trois if you wanna sound posh? The Mix provides the lowdown.

What is a threesome?

Well, the elusive threesome (AKA the menage a trois) is a very common fantasy. Three people have sex (any combination of genders or sexualities) with each other in a kind of ‘mini-orgy’, if you like. The big question is whether you should act on this fantasy, or just file the idea away with a big box of tissues for a rainy day.

Why have threesomes?

The most common reason for wanting one is the idea of trying something new, and having more to look at and feel. Some people want to have twice as much attention as they’d normally get during sex. Others may be drawn to threesomes because it’s ‘forbidden’, or just because the idea of horny sex without romantic attachment sounds appealing in their sex life.

Do you really want a threesome?

Some people try to push reluctant partners into threesomes that they don’t really want to do. Sometimes it’s a selfish power trip, and sometimes it’s just an excuse for being unfaithful without getting dumped. Think very carefully about any partner who doesn’t respect your feelings – do you really want to be in a relationship with someone like that? Agreeing to take part in a threesome to breathe life back into a failing relationship, or to stop your partner from leaving you, is probably going to backfire.

If you wanna say no to ANY sexual act but feel like you can’t, click here for some advice.

Threesome fall outs

Problems generally arise when two of the three are involved in a long-term relationship together. You may be in for a nasty shock when the people have sex with another person and insecurities (‘they want an extra partner because I’m not good enough in bed’) or jealousies (‘they want them more than they want me’) come out of the woodwork. You could also find out that your so-called straight partner is really gay or bisexual, but hasn’t come out yet. Or you could end up with one person you really fancy, plus someone who you obviously don’t. Talk about an awkward situation.

How to have threesomes safely

If you do decide to throw caution to the wind, don’t forget about safe sex. As always, keep your wits about you and be careful if you decide to get it on with people you don’t really know. Group sex of any kind is always more risky than sex with a long term partner. Trust your instincts and don’t take risks with your personal safety.

To find out how to talk about safe sex, read this article.

Having UK threesomes

UK threesomes are no different to any other threesome. Some people try threesomes with their friends, some people advertise for partners via apps and online, and others go to swingers’ clubs and parties. As for the actual sex, there’s no ‘right way’ or running order for proceedings. You just have to use your imagination and make it up as you go along.

Threesome trouble

We’ve already established it’s more to do with lust than a loving relationship. So if you don’t have any romantic expectations, you won’t be disappointed in that area. Oh, and never involve someone that you work with. That can get pretty messy, and we don’t just mean the sex.

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